Dating an ambivalent man


13-Apr-2020 09:15

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“No” has been considered and rejected, however fleetingly, and my “yes” has the quality of certainty.

If my desire to say “no” interferes with my “yes,” it will be said with hesitation and doubt, and a lingering uneasy feeling that causes me to hold back; I am unable to fully commit to that “yes.” So not only does the opposite polarity define my experience but the degree to which I have integrated it into my consciousness will also affect my experience.

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If I am saying “yes” to something wholeheartedly, I can feel that yes in every cell of my being.

So if the nature of ambivalence is the inability to resolve an internal conflict that results in a lack of presence; a common way of expressing this is confusion.

Ambivalence and confusion can be temporary states in all relationships, as we take time to resolve opposing or new information.

This article discusses the nature of ambivalence in relationships and the resulting dynamics.

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My perspective on this topic has developed over the past 20 years of working with individuals and couples and noticing how these dynamics emerge.

All important decisions are made with insufficient data – If you wait until you are 100% positive about the outcome you will never make a decision.



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